How Long?

People always say that all it takes is time for pain to fade, for the hurt to go away. I try to quantify it - for some things I'll tell myself that it will take a year, others a few months, a few days. I think I do it because I imagine it would work like my alarm clock. I always happen to wake up seconds before my alarm goes off in the morning, and sometimes I can wake up at a certain time the next day if I tell myself I have to be awake at that time. I imagine that by setting a deadline for myself to get over what ever it is I am trying to get over I will automatically feel better when that time comes.

Trouble is, it's not working and now I don't know what else to do. I don't want to still be in this mess in my head. I have made great efforts to keep moving this year, but they seem to be in vain and I feel like I am losing. I feel like everyone else is moving on, growing, improving, creating larger pockets of happiness for themselves, yet I am still here...here.